1 00:00:18,277 --> 00:00:19,342 (door shuts) BRYANA: Four and "O", 2 00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:22,396 four and "O", four and "O", four and "O"! 3 00:00:22,473 --> 00:00:25,357 Now, now, Bryana, remember what I said about boasting? 4 00:00:27,010 --> 00:00:28,185 You got to be accurate. 5 00:00:28,261 --> 00:00:30,187 Five and "O"! Five and "O"! 6 00:00:30,263 --> 00:00:32,731 (laughs) I got to go pee. 7 00:00:32,808 --> 00:00:34,283 Ooh! (whistle blows) Go pee. 8 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:36,802 Hey, Coach Stanley says 9 00:00:36,879 --> 00:00:38,987 I am the best assistant coach he's ever had. 10 00:00:39,064 --> 00:00:41,114 Yeah, you go on and enjoy baby girl, 11 00:00:41,191 --> 00:00:42,115 'cause we got practice, 12 00:00:42,192 --> 00:00:43,200 and it starts tomorrow. 13 00:00:43,276 --> 00:00:44,585 We've been going at it, right, Jordan? 14 00:00:44,661 --> 00:00:48,005 2/7. Two hours a day, seven days a week. 15 00:00:48,082 --> 00:00:49,840 You know, it's a new expression I'm trying to start. 16 00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:51,166 Kind of like 24/7, 17 00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:53,177 but mine is much more realistic, 18 00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:54,878 because really, who does something 19 00:00:54,955 --> 00:00:56,680 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? 20 00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:59,382 I'm going to start a whole bunch of expressions. 21 00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:02,636 I'm just showing the boy some of my moves from Chicago. 22 00:01:02,712 --> 00:01:03,812 Uh-oh. Yeah. 23 00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:05,138 The Macman crossover dribble, 24 00:01:05,215 --> 00:01:07,224 the smooth groove, no-look pass, 25 00:01:07,300 --> 00:01:10,852 and the Macman tomahawk jam, boy! Yeah! 26 00:01:10,929 --> 00:01:12,362 My George Gervin finger roll 27 00:01:12,439 --> 00:01:15,398 and the Shaq power slam was, between you and me, 28 00:01:15,475 --> 00:01:17,701 borrowed mainly from the Mac power slam. 29 00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:19,402 Oh, it does, does it? 30 00:01:19,479 --> 00:01:21,238 I mean, yours is good too, Shaq. 31 00:01:21,314 --> 00:01:24,166 So, are you trying out for the grade school team? 32 00:01:25,110 --> 00:01:27,410 No, um, what, me? 33 00:01:27,487 --> 00:01:30,789 No. I mean, I'm just a little excited for the boy. 34 00:01:30,866 --> 00:01:32,049 Really excited, you know? 35 00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:33,358 It's not about me; it's about the boy. 36 00:01:33,435 --> 00:01:35,344 Aren't you a little too big for that? 37 00:01:37,873 --> 00:01:40,674 I just told you, Shaq, about the boy. 38 00:01:40,750 --> 00:01:42,134 Too big for that, man. 39 00:01:42,210 --> 00:01:43,844 Well, I mean, you are, too. 40 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:45,887 You're too big to be hittin' me on my arm like that, too. 41 00:01:45,898 --> 00:01:47,122 What you going to do about it? 42 00:01:47,199 --> 00:01:48,557 I mean, you know, I'll tell you what. 43 00:01:48,633 --> 00:01:50,517 You do it again, you'll find out very quickly. 44 00:01:50,594 --> 00:01:53,270 You just rubbed it. I said "hit" like you did. 45 00:01:53,346 --> 00:01:55,897 You just rubbed a little harder than the first time. 46 00:01:55,974 --> 00:01:57,399 I said hit like you... You tappin'. 47 00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:58,692 Now, I want you to hit me like you did 48 00:01:58,768 --> 00:02:01,570 the first time, and watch, America... 49 00:02:01,646 --> 00:02:04,489 (mutters, chuckles) 50 00:02:04,566 --> 00:02:06,867 The Pistol Pete, hair-floppin', no-look pass. 51 00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,368 Less floppin', less floppin', 52 00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:09,911 but he's gettin' it together. (laughs) 53 00:02:09,988 --> 00:02:12,080 Come here, Jordan. 54 00:02:12,091 --> 00:02:13,915 Look here. 55 00:02:13,992 --> 00:02:15,375 You see this? 56 00:02:15,452 --> 00:02:17,502 This was mine back in the day. 57 00:02:17,579 --> 00:02:18,661 Wow! 58 00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,839 Conference champs two years in a row, 59 00:02:20,916 --> 00:02:22,549 but now, son, 60 00:02:22,626 --> 00:02:24,551 we're officially going to start our own dynasty. 61 00:02:24,628 --> 00:02:26,395 Yo, ho, ho, bro! 62 00:02:26,471 --> 00:02:29,139 That's another one of my new expressions. 63 00:02:29,150 --> 00:02:30,974 It means, "You can say that again," 64 00:02:31,051 --> 00:02:33,193 or "You got that right." Hmm! 65 00:02:35,406 --> 00:02:36,646 Okay. 66 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,815 Okay! Over here! 67 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:40,483 (indistinct chattering) 68 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:41,660 (whistle blows) 69 00:02:44,456 --> 00:02:45,655 (snickering) 70 00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:47,449 Still standing. 71 00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:49,993 Uh... well, that- that's right, Jordan. 72 00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:51,328 Now, look, don't get me wrong. 73 00:02:51,404 --> 00:02:53,297 Even though standing is very important 74 00:02:53,373 --> 00:02:55,457 in basketball, you know, passing, 75 00:02:55,533 --> 00:02:58,418 shooting... they're important, too. 76 00:02:58,495 --> 00:03:00,045 And I also can't dribble. 77 00:03:00,121 --> 00:03:01,504 (whistle blows) 78 00:03:01,581 --> 00:03:03,307 Look, there's a lot of other teams, Jordan. 79 00:03:03,383 --> 00:03:05,550 What about swimming? Okay, 80 00:03:05,627 --> 00:03:07,394 but I'm not supposed to put my head under the water. 81 00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:12,474 What about wrestling? 82 00:03:12,550 --> 00:03:14,184 Ooh, I love wrestling. Yeah. 83 00:03:14,261 --> 00:03:16,061 I watch it all the time on TV. 84 00:03:16,137 --> 00:03:18,980 (grunting) What? That looks real... 85 00:03:19,057 --> 00:03:20,449 and where are their capes? 86 00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:22,868 Good luck. 87 00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:28,823 Hey, baby, check him out. 88 00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:30,033 Hey! 89 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:31,034 How'd the first day 90 00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:32,244 of practice go? 91 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:33,703 I didn't make the basketball team. 92 00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:36,081 The coach says I stink at basketball. 93 00:03:36,157 --> 00:03:38,041 Well, he didn't use those exact words, 94 00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:39,960 but the other kids did. 95 00:03:40,036 --> 00:03:41,094 Well, where'd you get your uniform? 96 00:03:41,171 --> 00:03:43,013 I did make the gymnastics team 97 00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:44,589 just like Vanessa. 98 00:03:44,666 --> 00:03:46,350 I'm going to be the Lord of the Rings. 99 00:03:48,169 --> 00:03:49,353 Lord of the Rings?! 100 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:51,513 Just like Nessa?! 101 00:03:51,523 --> 00:03:53,473 America, that can't be good. No, sir. 102 00:03:53,550 --> 00:03:55,058 You want to be like Uncle Bernie. 103 00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:56,543 World don't need two Nessas. 104 00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:59,029 Don't be following her footsteps. She trouble. 105 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:00,272 Uncle Bernie, 106 00:04:00,348 --> 00:04:01,606 the rings-- they're really hard, 107 00:04:01,683 --> 00:04:03,441 but if Jordan's going to do them, 108 00:04:03,518 --> 00:04:06,152 he has to develop his upper body strength. 109 00:04:06,229 --> 00:04:07,737 He does? Yeah, you know, 110 00:04:07,814 --> 00:04:10,532 like, his delts, pecs, traps, and lats. 111 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:13,743 Jordan wants delts, pecs, lats, and what? 112 00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:14,753 Traps. 113 00:04:14,830 --> 00:04:17,205 Oh, and he also wants a chin-up bar. 114 00:04:17,282 --> 00:04:18,206 (chuckles) 115 00:04:18,217 --> 00:04:19,508 All right. 116 00:04:19,584 --> 00:04:22,552 America, I spoke too soon. 117 00:04:22,629 --> 00:04:24,379 Gymnastic and the girls are about to do 118 00:04:24,456 --> 00:04:25,672 what I never could do: 119 00:04:25,749 --> 00:04:27,215 that is, make a man out of Jordan. 120 00:04:27,292 --> 00:04:31,186 Gymnastics. That's an Olympic sport. 121 00:04:31,263 --> 00:04:32,679 Hey, baby, you didn't get this squash 122 00:04:32,756 --> 00:04:34,931 from a grocery store, did you? Nope. Farmer's Market. 123 00:04:35,008 --> 00:04:36,433 So, what's going on? 124 00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:37,392 Nothing. (Jordan grunting) 125 00:04:37,469 --> 00:04:39,127 How's the gig? 126 00:04:39,071 --> 00:04:42,531 Ah. Fine. Remember Francine from Accounting? Francine... 127 00:04:42,607 --> 00:04:44,357 Oh, that's the lady with the big feet. (Jordan grunting) 128 00:04:44,434 --> 00:04:45,859 Mm-hmm. Yeah. 129 00:04:45,935 --> 00:04:47,569 Okay, so she comes back from vacation, right, 130 00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:49,529 with this new nose, and she expects nobody to notice. 131 00:04:49,606 --> 00:04:51,406 What? It's so weird. 132 00:04:51,483 --> 00:04:53,959 Baby girl, you eat your squash. Yum, yum. 133 00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:58,246 I'm telling you, man, athletics is taking over the boy's life. 134 00:04:58,257 --> 00:05:01,091 It's only fitting. It's part of the inevitable living under this roof. 135 00:05:01,168 --> 00:05:04,461 Hey, pommel horse, rings. Gymnasts are strong, man. Yeah. 136 00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:06,338 -Sure is. -Yeah, remember Kerri Strug? 137 00:05:06,414 --> 00:05:08,173 Oh, man, broken ankle, 138 00:05:08,249 --> 00:05:10,342 all coming down to the last vault... 139 00:05:10,418 --> 00:05:13,803 then landing it, perfect. 140 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:14,888 (laughing) 141 00:05:14,964 --> 00:05:17,015 You look just like her, man. 142 00:05:17,092 --> 00:05:19,443 I made two bills off that vault. 143 00:05:19,519 --> 00:05:21,236 What? Hey, hey, hey, uh, hey, man. 144 00:05:21,313 --> 00:05:24,356 That's a little girl, man, not a horse. 145 00:05:24,432 --> 00:05:26,608 Wait a minute, who-who-who says when do you even care? 146 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:28,943 No, man, this isn't appropriate, man. 147 00:05:29,020 --> 00:05:30,554 When's the boy's first meet? 148 00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:33,114 Um, tomorrow. I'm going to be there, front and center. 149 00:05:33,191 --> 00:05:34,657 I'm going with you. I mean, why wait 150 00:05:34,734 --> 00:05:37,327 four years for my gymnastics. 151 00:05:37,404 --> 00:05:39,621 Oh... Jordan asked me 152 00:05:39,697 --> 00:05:41,998 to put up a chin-up bar. 153 00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:42,966 Oh... Oh... 154 00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:44,042 What? Check him out. 155 00:05:44,119 --> 00:05:45,010 Yeah. 156 00:05:55,380 --> 00:05:56,688 (crowd "oohing" and applauding) 157 00:05:58,901 --> 00:06:02,110 9.2, 9.3, tops. 158 00:06:03,430 --> 00:06:04,654 WOMAN: Oh... 159 00:06:04,731 --> 00:06:06,189 9.5? 160 00:06:06,266 --> 00:06:09,359 Oh, man, must be out of their mind, man. 161 00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:11,361 That's ridiculous. 162 00:06:11,372 --> 00:06:14,030 Oh, I think Jordan's next. 163 00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:16,792 ( "Eye of the Tiger" playing) 164 00:06:30,582 --> 00:06:32,382 What happened to Lord of the Rings? 165 00:06:32,459 --> 00:06:34,059 What happened to Lord of the Rings?! 166 00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:44,727 ♪ Risin' up, back on the street ♪ 167 00:06:44,804 --> 00:06:49,741 ♪ Did my time, took my chances 168 00:06:49,818 --> 00:06:52,068 ♪ Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet ♪ 169 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:53,820 ♪ Just a man... ♪ 170 00:06:53,897 --> 00:06:55,488 Big fella... 171 00:06:55,565 --> 00:06:57,240 this don't leave the gym. 172 00:06:57,317 --> 00:06:58,616 Yeah, but what about the tights? 173 00:06:58,693 --> 00:07:01,420 No. Don't leave the gym, you hear me? 174 00:07:02,947 --> 00:07:04,589 The gym. 175 00:07:05,909 --> 00:07:07,092 (chuckles) 176 00:07:11,664 --> 00:07:14,674 Six and "O", six and "O", six and "O", 177 00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:16,050 six and "O", six and "O", 178 00:07:16,127 --> 00:07:17,435 six and "O"! 179 00:07:17,512 --> 00:07:19,012 Honey, what is it? (Bryana continues chanting) 180 00:07:19,088 --> 00:07:21,314 The boy was dancing with ribbons. 181 00:07:21,391 --> 00:07:23,391 What? Wait, I-I-I thought 182 00:07:23,468 --> 00:07:25,059 he was on the gymnastics team? 183 00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:28,271 They added ribbon twirling to the Olympics in 1984. 184 00:07:28,348 --> 00:07:30,899 (chuckling): They give a medal for...? 185 00:07:30,975 --> 00:07:32,701 That can't be right. 186 00:07:32,777 --> 00:07:34,369 Baby, I've got to get that boy off the team. 187 00:07:34,446 --> 00:07:36,070 I mean, Macmen-- we don't... 188 00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:39,073 I'm not going to that meet at St. Agnes. I'm not going. 189 00:07:39,150 --> 00:07:40,992 (sighs) 190 00:07:41,069 --> 00:07:42,602 You should count your blessings. 191 00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:45,079 Today, Bryana fell, and they kicked her in the head. 192 00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:46,882 I wish somebody'd kick that boy in the damn head. 193 00:07:46,958 --> 00:07:48,583 Come on, sweetheart, 194 00:07:48,594 --> 00:07:50,585 a ribbon twirler? Come on, Wanda. 195 00:07:50,662 --> 00:07:52,253 Ain't no danger. Ain't no danger. 196 00:07:52,330 --> 00:07:54,964 It'll be okay, but you would've been proud 197 00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,892 of my little Bryana today. 198 00:07:56,968 --> 00:07:58,551 Your little Bryana? 199 00:07:58,628 --> 00:07:59,677 She our baby girl. 200 00:07:59,754 --> 00:08:00,720 Don't take her away from me now. 201 00:08:00,797 --> 00:08:02,222 Well, she didn't even cry. 202 00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:03,431 He did. 203 00:08:03,508 --> 00:08:04,749 Wait, wait, wait, 204 00:08:04,826 --> 00:08:06,234 you said there was no danger. He got hurt? 205 00:08:06,311 --> 00:08:08,520 His routine helped the team win today. 206 00:08:08,596 --> 00:08:10,438 They was tears of joy, sweetheart, 207 00:08:10,515 --> 00:08:13,191 tears of damn joy. 208 00:08:13,268 --> 00:08:15,911 Crying all over the place, everybody weepin'. 209 00:08:16,938 --> 00:08:18,446 VANESSA: Did you do the snake toss? 210 00:08:18,523 --> 00:08:19,764 Double snake toss, 211 00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:21,449 and Uncle Bernie was there to see it. 212 00:08:21,526 --> 00:08:23,701 Lord of the Rings. 213 00:08:23,778 --> 00:08:25,078 What happened to traps and lats? 214 00:08:25,154 --> 00:08:27,747 My-my traps and lats just aren't there yet. 215 00:08:27,824 --> 00:08:29,624 The coach says I should wait till puberty, 216 00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:31,551 but until then, I'm Lord of the Ribbons. 217 00:08:32,704 --> 00:08:34,587 (chuckles) 218 00:08:34,664 --> 00:08:36,256 And you knew about this, didn't you? 219 00:08:36,332 --> 00:08:37,641 I did. 220 00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:38,925 When were you going to tell me, Nessa? 221 00:08:39,002 --> 00:08:40,552 I didn't think you'd like it. 222 00:08:40,628 --> 00:08:42,595 (sighs) Look, I helped Jordan with his routine, 223 00:08:42,672 --> 00:08:44,030 and you're always telling me 224 00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:46,766 to look out for Jordan and be a good big sister. 225 00:08:46,843 --> 00:08:48,652 That's all I was trying to do. 226 00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:50,036 Now you're perfect. 227 00:08:49,947 --> 00:08:51,254 You helped him get on the gymnastics team, 228 00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,523 now tell him how to get him kicked off. 229 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:56,276 Maybe I need to put some drugs in his urine or something. What you think, baby? 230 00:08:56,352 --> 00:08:57,860 Uncle Bernie, 231 00:08:57,937 --> 00:08:59,529 he likes it, and he's good at it. 232 00:08:59,606 --> 00:09:01,164 "Eye of the Tiger." 233 00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:03,124 You could've picked a better song. 234 00:09:04,035 --> 00:09:05,451 Jordan picked the song. 235 00:09:05,528 --> 00:09:07,495 N-Now you rippin' my heart out. 236 00:09:07,572 --> 00:09:09,163 Here he comes. 237 00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,498 ( "Eye of the Tiger" playing) 238 00:09:10,575 --> 00:09:11,666 Look. 239 00:09:11,743 --> 00:09:12,667 Oh. Oh. 240 00:09:12,744 --> 00:09:13,843 Ooh. Ooh. 241 00:09:15,538 --> 00:09:17,088 And I put up a chin-up bar. 242 00:09:17,165 --> 00:09:18,923 We both know he can't do a chin-up. 243 00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,475 Do I got a paper cut? 244 00:09:22,211 --> 00:09:24,178 (cheering) Hands, that was hands! 245 00:09:24,255 --> 00:09:26,848 Number 17, right halfback! Come on, ref! 246 00:09:26,924 --> 00:09:28,141 (whistle blows) 247 00:09:28,217 --> 00:09:31,102 Good eye, Wanda. You're the best. (sighs) 248 00:09:31,179 --> 00:09:34,188 (whistle blows) Over to Kate, to Kate, good, good! 249 00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:35,565 Come on, Bryana's wide open! 250 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:37,200 She's wide open! 251 00:09:37,277 --> 00:09:40,453 Oh, did you see what that chubby girl just did to baby girl? 252 00:09:40,530 --> 00:09:42,030 This ain't football, Refrigerator. (whistle blows) 253 00:09:42,106 --> 00:09:43,698 Let me tell you... Honey, honey, please, 254 00:09:43,709 --> 00:09:45,533 sit down. 255 00:09:45,610 --> 00:09:47,043 (girls shouting) 256 00:09:49,789 --> 00:09:51,706 All right. Bry, honey, does it hurt? 257 00:09:51,717 --> 00:09:53,291 I'm going to kill her. 258 00:09:53,368 --> 00:09:54,717 That's my girl. 259 00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:56,511 All right, Ace bandages, and give me orange slices. 260 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:03,226 (voice slowed and deep): Another. 261 00:10:15,106 --> 00:10:16,489 (growls): Back in there. (yelling) 262 00:10:17,642 --> 00:10:18,533 Yeah! 263 00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:20,744 (whistle blows) 264 00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:21,736 Hey, honey, where you going? 265 00:10:21,747 --> 00:10:22,871 It's getting exciting. 266 00:10:22,947 --> 00:10:24,238 I promised Jordan I'd take him 267 00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,207 to the sports store to buy some equipment. 268 00:10:26,284 --> 00:10:29,210 Okay, all right, baby. All right, let's go! 269 00:10:29,287 --> 00:10:32,580 Jordan, Jordan, don't touch nothin'. 270 00:10:32,657 --> 00:10:34,666 Better not touch nothin'. 271 00:10:34,742 --> 00:10:36,084 (laughs) 272 00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:38,169 I'm-I'm sorry. Excuse me. It's all right. 273 00:10:38,246 --> 00:10:39,629 Listen, maybe you can help me. Yeah? 274 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:41,422 M-M-My boy, he needs, um... 275 00:10:41,499 --> 00:10:43,257 This is kind of... kind of awkward. 276 00:10:43,334 --> 00:10:45,259 I've never bought this before. Don't worry about it. 277 00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,261 Cups and athletic supporters are in Aisle Two, 278 00:10:47,338 --> 00:10:49,773 top of the shelf. Oh, no, no, no, you... you don't understand. 279 00:10:49,849 --> 00:10:53,726 My... the boy, he needs some... unitards. 280 00:10:53,803 --> 00:10:54,894 I'm sorry. What? 281 00:10:54,905 --> 00:10:56,562 Unitards. Unitards. 282 00:10:56,639 --> 00:10:57,981 You're kind of loud. 283 00:10:57,824 --> 00:10:59,315 Let me see if I can find somebody for you, okay? 284 00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:01,025 Thank you. I'll meet you out back here. 285 00:11:01,036 --> 00:11:02,902 Jordan, don't touch nothin'! 286 00:11:02,979 --> 00:11:06,531 Shoulder pads, mitt, unitard, 287 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,449 helmet, boxing glove, 288 00:11:08,526 --> 00:11:12,161 (laughs): jock itch, and hockey stick. 289 00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:13,955 (chuckles) JORDAN: Uncle Bernie, 290 00:11:14,031 --> 00:11:16,332 we also need ribbon. 5 and 3/8th. 291 00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:18,793 That's exactly what Mary Margaret O'Brien used 292 00:11:18,804 --> 00:11:21,680 at the 1994 Nationals. 293 00:11:21,756 --> 00:11:23,423 Uh, we don't, uh, sell ribbon, 294 00:11:23,499 --> 00:11:26,384 but there is an Ashby Fabrics on Sepulveda. 295 00:11:26,461 --> 00:11:28,561 Ashby Fabrics on Sepulveda, here we come. 296 00:11:36,012 --> 00:11:37,737 Hey, I thought we were going to watch the game. 297 00:11:39,515 --> 00:11:42,158 Six... 298 00:11:44,729 --> 00:11:46,279 ...seven. 299 00:11:46,355 --> 00:11:47,580 So, uh, what you got there? 300 00:11:47,657 --> 00:11:49,282 Baby, I got equipment for every sport. 301 00:11:49,358 --> 00:11:50,366 Something got to stick. 302 00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:52,076 (chuckles): Save the receipt. 303 00:11:52,153 --> 00:11:53,486 Uh, Bryana, that bath is ready. 304 00:11:53,563 --> 00:11:55,747 I want you to get out of those dirty clothes. 305 00:11:55,823 --> 00:11:57,540 I don't want to take a bath. 306 00:11:57,617 --> 00:11:59,000 And this isn't dirt. 307 00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:01,669 This is blood from Katlin's nose. 308 00:12:01,746 --> 00:12:05,557 Well, at least wash your hands. (both chuckling) 309 00:12:11,422 --> 00:12:14,149 (belching) 310 00:12:14,225 --> 00:12:18,186 JORDAN: ♪ Risin' up, back on the street ♪ 311 00:12:18,262 --> 00:12:22,482 ♪ Took my time, took my chances ♪ 312 00:12:22,558 --> 00:12:26,286 ♪ I went the distance, now I'm back on my feet ♪ 313 00:12:26,362 --> 00:12:30,281 ♪ Just a man and his will to survive ♪ 314 00:12:30,292 --> 00:12:31,991 ♪ It's the eye of the tiger ♪ 315 00:12:32,068 --> 00:12:33,710 ♪ It's the thrill of the fight... ♪ 316 00:12:37,532 --> 00:12:41,217 Hey, uh, Wanda says baby girl's team is undefeated. 317 00:12:42,837 --> 00:12:44,003 7 and "O." 318 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:45,680 I know what undefeated is. 319 00:12:48,084 --> 00:12:49,759 So, how's the boy doing? 320 00:12:49,836 --> 00:12:50,968 You know, you never did tell us 321 00:12:51,045 --> 00:12:52,261 how that gymnastics went. 322 00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:54,472 He's fine. Everybody's fine. 323 00:12:54,549 --> 00:12:56,349 Is this Oprah, or are we playing poker, or what? 324 00:12:56,425 --> 00:12:58,059 Ooh. 325 00:12:58,135 --> 00:12:59,352 Let's play. 326 00:12:59,428 --> 00:13:02,730 Oh, that's too rich for me, man. 327 00:13:02,807 --> 00:13:05,149 I just do not have the eye of the tiger tonight. 328 00:13:05,226 --> 00:13:06,150 Well, I do. 329 00:13:06,227 --> 00:13:07,318 You know what? 330 00:13:07,395 --> 00:13:09,278 Matter of fact, I feel so good man, 331 00:13:09,355 --> 00:13:10,413 y'all might as well 332 00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:12,740 just wrap that pot up right there 333 00:13:12,817 --> 00:13:14,367 and tie a ribbon around it. 334 00:13:14,443 --> 00:13:16,118 (singing intro to "Eye of the Tiger") 335 00:13:16,195 --> 00:13:20,089 (laughter) 336 00:13:22,118 --> 00:13:23,167 Oh, man... 337 00:13:23,178 --> 00:13:25,044 Hey, look, man, I tried, man. 338 00:13:25,121 --> 00:13:26,587 I tried. 339 00:13:26,664 --> 00:13:28,673 That's just too much to ask, man. 340 00:13:28,749 --> 00:13:32,093 ♪ Took my time, took my chances... ♪ Whoo! 341 00:13:32,169 --> 00:13:33,961 Oh, there's the ribbon, there's the ribbon. 342 00:13:34,039 --> 00:13:37,065 (cartoon noise on TV) ♪ ...Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet ♪ 343 00:13:37,141 --> 00:13:40,560 ♪ Just a man and his will to survive ♪ 344 00:13:40,636 --> 00:13:44,981 ♪ It's the eye of the tiger risin' up to the street... ♪ 345 00:13:45,057 --> 00:13:46,941 You know, you let me down, big fella. 346 00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:49,026 Hey, hey, I ain't the one dancing with the ribbon, man. 347 00:13:49,103 --> 00:13:50,236 Come on, now. 348 00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:51,946 That's true, it ain't him. 349 00:13:51,957 --> 00:13:53,514 Dancing with ribbons. 350 00:13:53,591 --> 00:13:55,408 Man, it's a Catholic school; that's a sin right there. 351 00:13:55,484 --> 00:13:58,035 You know, patty cake more masculine. (men laughing) 352 00:13:58,112 --> 00:13:59,754 Double Dutch take more muscle. 353 00:13:59,831 --> 00:14:02,915 Why don't the boy just put a bow in his hair, sissy? 354 00:14:02,992 --> 00:14:04,750 (men laughing) Oh! 355 00:14:04,827 --> 00:14:07,262 I'd rather see him take a cooking class or something. (laughter) 356 00:14:07,338 --> 00:14:08,638 Oh, come on, man! That's stirrin' the pot, you know... 357 00:14:14,003 --> 00:14:15,553 Yo, baby! 358 00:14:15,630 --> 00:14:16,896 Shh, come here. 359 00:14:18,308 --> 00:14:20,066 Jordan's home. 360 00:14:21,510 --> 00:14:23,436 What happened to that ribbon practice? 361 00:14:23,512 --> 00:14:25,021 Jordan quit the team. 362 00:14:25,097 --> 00:14:26,731 Thank you, Jesus, thank you, Jesus! 363 00:14:26,807 --> 00:14:28,116 Don't play with Jesus. 364 00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,260 Honey, he threw out the ribbon. 365 00:14:31,337 --> 00:14:34,280 What? We could have used that at Christmas. That boy crazy. 366 00:14:34,291 --> 00:14:35,731 He said he was going to focus 367 00:14:35,809 --> 00:14:38,910 on making the basketball team for next year. Hmm. 368 00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,578 I think we should talk to him. 369 00:14:40,655 --> 00:14:43,205 What? And jeopardize screwing this up? 370 00:14:43,282 --> 00:14:44,674 You're crazy. 371 00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:46,918 He was so excited about being a part of a team No, no, no. 372 00:14:46,994 --> 00:14:48,794 and now-- pfft, now he's in there Wanda... 373 00:14:48,871 --> 00:14:50,388 just watching cartoons. 374 00:14:50,465 --> 00:14:52,798 I'm talking about the cartoons without the animals. No, no, no. 375 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:54,634 He hates the cartoons without the animals. 376 00:14:54,710 --> 00:14:56,102 Baby, baby, baby, don't you see it? 377 00:14:56,179 --> 00:14:57,803 The boy was going through a phase. 378 00:14:57,880 --> 00:14:59,764 He finally got through this phase. 379 00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:01,641 We never had this happen to us before. 380 00:15:01,717 --> 00:15:03,351 Trust me. Let me handle it. 381 00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:04,727 Jordan? 382 00:15:04,804 --> 00:15:08,356 You want to shoot hoops with your uncle? 383 00:15:08,432 --> 00:15:10,399 JORDAN: Okay. 384 00:15:10,476 --> 00:15:13,161 Oh, and get rid of those unitards. 385 00:15:13,237 --> 00:15:15,321 Come on, boy! 386 00:15:15,398 --> 00:15:18,616 America, there's hope yet for the Mac dynasty. 387 00:15:18,693 --> 00:15:20,242 Yeah, it's my fault. 388 00:15:20,319 --> 00:15:21,869 I pushed the boy too soon. 389 00:15:21,946 --> 00:15:23,871 He's simply not ready this season, 390 00:15:23,948 --> 00:15:26,749 but next season, a whole 'nother story. 391 00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:28,417 Coach Bernie Mac in the house. 392 00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,044 Look alive, boy. 393 00:15:30,055 --> 00:15:32,380 (loud thud) 394 00:15:32,456 --> 00:15:33,464 Two seasons. 395 00:15:33,541 --> 00:15:35,174 JORDAN: Ow. 396 00:15:35,251 --> 00:15:36,550 Get up. 397 00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:38,144 Walk it off. 398 00:15:43,926 --> 00:15:45,685 Same time tomorrow, Jordan. 399 00:15:45,761 --> 00:15:46,727 JORDAN: Okay. 400 00:15:46,804 --> 00:15:48,062 2-7, boy. 401 00:15:48,139 --> 00:15:49,522 JORDAN: What? Oh, yeah, right. 402 00:15:49,598 --> 00:15:50,940 What are you doing? 403 00:15:51,017 --> 00:15:54,360 Teaching Jordan how to play basketball. 404 00:15:54,371 --> 00:15:55,653 Basketball is the future. 405 00:15:55,730 --> 00:15:57,655 Gymnastics was the past. 406 00:15:57,732 --> 00:16:01,325 Don't nobody give a whoop about no doggone gymnastics, Nessa. 407 00:16:01,402 --> 00:16:02,785 But you know what? 408 00:16:02,862 --> 00:16:05,421 You keep up the good work. 409 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:06,872 Jordan quit his team today, 410 00:16:06,949 --> 00:16:08,916 and I think he needs one of your 411 00:16:08,993 --> 00:16:11,010 "You should never be a quitter" speeches. 412 00:16:11,087 --> 00:16:13,796 Well, I'm changing my position about quitter. 413 00:16:13,873 --> 00:16:15,506 It's all right to be a quitter. 414 00:16:15,583 --> 00:16:17,842 I don't believe you. 415 00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:19,885 Look here, girl. 416 00:16:19,962 --> 00:16:21,771 It was a phase. 417 00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:23,431 It was a good thing he quit, too. 418 00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:24,590 Before long, all his friends and kids 419 00:16:24,667 --> 00:16:25,641 would have been teasing him. 420 00:16:25,718 --> 00:16:27,685 Boy dancing with ribbons. 421 00:16:27,762 --> 00:16:29,562 That can be hard on a boy. 422 00:16:29,638 --> 00:16:31,564 His friends were fine with it. 423 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:33,357 And he was helping the team win. 424 00:16:33,434 --> 00:16:36,902 The only people teasing Jordan were you and your friends. 425 00:16:36,979 --> 00:16:38,696 That's why he quit the team. 426 00:16:38,773 --> 00:16:41,574 He heard you making fun of him. 427 00:16:41,650 --> 00:16:43,793 It wasn't a phase. 428 00:16:52,462 --> 00:16:53,586 Damn. 429 00:16:53,662 --> 00:16:55,004 America, you know, 430 00:16:55,081 --> 00:16:57,056 sometime, my job isn't to be proud of our children 431 00:16:57,133 --> 00:16:59,759 when they succeed at something we want them to do, 432 00:16:59,835 --> 00:17:01,327 but to be proud of them 433 00:17:01,404 --> 00:17:03,721 when they succeed at something they want to do. 434 00:17:03,798 --> 00:17:05,222 I got to be honest, Bernie. Mm-hmm? 435 00:17:05,299 --> 00:17:06,891 You know the kids that got the little stick 436 00:17:06,967 --> 00:17:08,834 with the little ribbon on the end, 437 00:17:08,911 --> 00:17:10,260 and they making that noise, "Whew whew whew," And they twirling it, 438 00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:12,063 "Whew whew whew," and they're making little designs, 439 00:17:12,139 --> 00:17:13,439 and just doing this and doing that? 440 00:17:13,516 --> 00:17:14,732 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 441 00:17:14,809 --> 00:17:16,567 That's beautiful, man. 442 00:17:16,644 --> 00:17:19,287 That's like flowers in the air. 443 00:17:20,815 --> 00:17:23,124 (sniffling) 444 00:17:26,529 --> 00:17:28,504 Hey, Uncle Bernie, watch this. 445 00:17:30,866 --> 00:17:31,957 (rattling) 446 00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:33,834 Don't worry about that, Air Jordan. 447 00:17:33,911 --> 00:17:35,311 Come over here. 448 00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:38,255 Right before you came out, I hit the backboard. 449 00:17:38,332 --> 00:17:39,799 Jordan, sit down. 450 00:17:39,875 --> 00:17:41,175 You should have seen it. 451 00:17:41,252 --> 00:17:42,384 Bam! 452 00:17:42,461 --> 00:17:43,561 Right against the wood. 453 00:17:43,638 --> 00:17:44,937 Yeah? It was great. 454 00:17:45,014 --> 00:17:47,348 Son, why'd you quit the gymnastics team? 455 00:17:47,424 --> 00:17:48,891 It was a lame team. 456 00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:51,435 And that music-- it was lame too. 457 00:17:51,512 --> 00:17:52,779 You don't believe that. 458 00:17:52,855 --> 00:17:55,573 No. It was a great song. 459 00:17:55,650 --> 00:17:58,484 But you thought it was lame. 460 00:17:58,561 --> 00:18:02,488 You know, son, sometimes it's not important what I think. 461 00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:05,699 Sometimes. 462 00:18:05,710 --> 00:18:06,867 Well, I thought it was a great song 463 00:18:06,944 --> 00:18:07,910 for ribbon twirling. 464 00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:09,829 Rhythmic gymnastics. 465 00:18:09,905 --> 00:18:10,930 See, look at that. 466 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,540 I learned something right there. 467 00:18:12,616 --> 00:18:13,833 I also learned that sometime 468 00:18:13,909 --> 00:18:15,459 Uncle Bernie can say hurtful things. 469 00:18:15,536 --> 00:18:17,294 Jordan, son, 470 00:18:17,371 --> 00:18:20,339 I had my heart set on you playing basketball. 471 00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,632 Vanessa says you're trying 472 00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:23,134 to recapture your youth through me. 473 00:18:23,210 --> 00:18:25,219 But you had your mind set on something else, 474 00:18:25,296 --> 00:18:26,345 and that's okay. 475 00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:27,880 Don't get me wrong. 476 00:18:27,957 --> 00:18:31,225 I understand trying to relive your past glories at your age. 477 00:18:31,302 --> 00:18:32,935 60, 65. 478 00:18:33,012 --> 00:18:34,362 I ain't no 65. 479 00:18:34,438 --> 00:18:35,771 50, 55? 480 00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,523 Who the hell told this boy I'm 50...? 481 00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:38,524 It's not important. 482 00:18:38,601 --> 00:18:40,526 It's just that your past glories 483 00:18:40,603 --> 00:18:41,777 must seem like ancient history. 484 00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:44,029 Look here, boy. 485 00:18:44,106 --> 00:18:46,240 Tomorrow you got a meet against St. Agnes, 486 00:18:46,317 --> 00:18:48,242 and there's two things you got to get, Jordan. 487 00:18:48,253 --> 00:18:50,452 What? One is a new ribbon. 488 00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:51,704 And two-- 489 00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:53,339 the eye of the tiger. 490 00:18:55,618 --> 00:18:58,711 Let your Uncle Bernie show you how to put it in, son. 491 00:18:58,787 --> 00:19:00,221 You put it in there, boy. 492 00:19:08,505 --> 00:19:11,357 ( intro to "Eye of the Tiger" playing) 493 00:19:29,652 --> 00:19:33,746 ♪ Risin' up, back on the street ♪ 494 00:19:33,822 --> 00:19:37,049 ♪ Did my time, took my chances 495 00:19:38,577 --> 00:19:41,921 ♪ Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet ♪ 496 00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:46,258 ♪ Just a man and his will to survive ♪ 497 00:19:46,335 --> 00:19:50,596 ♪ It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight ♪ 498 00:19:50,607 --> 00:19:54,767 ♪ Risin' up to the challenge of our rival ♪ 499 00:19:54,843 --> 00:19:59,405 ♪ And the last-known survivor stalks his prey in the night ♪ 500 00:19:59,482 --> 00:20:03,451 ♪ And he's watching us all with the eye ♪ 501 00:20:05,813 --> 00:20:08,781 ♪ Of the tiger ♪ 502 00:20:08,857 --> 00:20:10,074 (applauding) 503 00:20:10,150 --> 00:20:11,825 VANESSA: Triple snake. 504 00:20:11,902 --> 00:20:14,128 That's my boy. 505 00:20:17,467 --> 00:20:19,375 You were great, Jordan. 506 00:20:19,451 --> 00:20:22,970 Hurry up. We're all going for pizza. 507 00:20:24,248 --> 00:20:26,340 Hey, Uncle Bernie, have you noticed 508 00:20:26,351 --> 00:20:28,968 how many pretty girls are on the gymnastics team? 509 00:20:29,044 --> 00:20:30,678 Don't get me wrong. I mean, I love my ribbons, 510 00:20:30,754 --> 00:20:35,140 but pretty girls sure are a nice fringe benefit. 511 00:20:35,217 --> 00:20:37,142 Especially Chrissie. 512 00:20:37,219 --> 00:20:38,811 Is she the one who did the rings? 513 00:20:38,887 --> 00:20:40,980 Yeah. She's really strong. 514 00:20:40,990 --> 00:20:42,681 And I think she likes me. 515 00:20:42,325 --> 00:20:45,368 ♪ Now if you feel that you can't go on ♪ 516 00:20:46,621 --> 00:20:48,737 ♪ Because all of your hope is gone ♪ 517 00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:50,614 You see that, America? 518 00:20:50,691 --> 00:20:52,083 The dynasty continue, 519 00:20:52,159 --> 00:20:54,827 and I'm sitting at the judges' table. 520 00:20:54,903 --> 00:20:56,537 I'd give that boy a ten. 521 00:20:56,547 --> 00:20:57,538 ♪ Come on, girl ♪ 522 00:20:57,614 --> 00:20:59,090 Oh, yeah. 523 00:21:03,012 --> 00:21:04,962 America. Aren't you a little too big for that, man? 524 00:21:05,039 --> 00:21:06,588 I just told you it's all about the boy, Shaq. 525 00:21:06,665 --> 00:21:08,132 You know, you don't be listenin'. 526 00:21:08,142 --> 00:21:09,591 Whatever, man. 527 00:21:09,668 --> 00:21:11,519 You know. Yeah, I know whatever, man. You know. 528 00:21:11,595 --> 00:21:12,569 What? 529 00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:14,138 What you think I said, Shaq? 530 00:21:14,214 --> 00:21:15,556 What? Bust a move. 531 00:21:15,632 --> 00:21:17,141 What's up then? Bust a move. 532 00:21:17,151 --> 00:21:18,209 Come on now. 533 00:21:18,285 --> 00:21:19,310 Come on, make-- make a move. 534 00:21:19,386 --> 00:21:21,145 (laughing) 535 00:21:21,155 --> 00:21:23,230 Y'all are crazy. 536 00:21:23,307 --> 00:21:26,817 Better talk to him. 537 00:21:26,894 --> 00:21:28,452 David and Goliath. 538 00:21:29,563 --> 00:21:31,864 1-11. (chuckles) 539 00:21:31,940 --> 00:21:33,874 Captioned by VISUAL DATA